"Ere! 'old on — you're dead"

A firearms expert caught with an arsenal of seven air guns, a sub-machine gun, a shotgun, a rifle, and more than 600 rounds of ammunition is hoping his involvement with James Bond will spare him jail.

Simon Churchman, 63, was charged after police discovered the weapons at his cottage in Kirkcudbright, Scotland, in 2018.

He pleaded guilty, yet his lawyer told the High Court in Glasgow that she will argue "exceptional circumstances" in a bid to avoid a possible five-year prison term.

Defending, Lili Prais said:

"His position is that the item [a Sampoi sub-machine gun] was purchased in the 1980s in Tottenham Court Road in London and was bought as a blank".

Prais described how he was "involved in giving guidance for a Bond film where the opening scene involved a paintballing exercise in Gilbrator".

"He is an expert in firearms", she added.

"It is his involvement in that movie which called for this to be modified to discharge paintballs and, in so doing, render it possible to fire bullets".

She revealed her client had "photographs and paperwork to "support the James Bond proposition".

Eagle-eyed Bond fans will note that the film in question must be The Living Daylights from 34 years ago. 

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